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Corporate Structure |
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Bart Purcell, CEO /CFO Mr. Purcell, 51, graduated from college in 1978. He founded (and eventually drove into the ground) Bart’s Parts, Inc.; a company that sold spare parts for Edsels. He has held various positions of decreasing responsibility until he started Grottos and Fins. He has stated on numerous occasions that he conceptualizes rocks in his head. He lives in a cave in Connecticut with a family of wolves and a small troll.
CR Purcell, Vice-President of Art Direction Ms. Purcell, 15, is the youngest executive officer in the USA. An immensely talented artistic force, she will only answer to the name Joseph Kablinki. Her contribution to Grottos and Fins is immeasurable. The color and texture of the rocks are vital components of the end product. Mr. Kablinki (as she insists on being called) is remarkably athletic in stark contrast to what now appears to be a daily habit of tripping over small objects for no discernible reason. She lives in Connecticut and claims her father thinks she is a troll.
Zach Purcell, Vice-President, Marketing and Finance Mr. Purcell, 21, presently attends Boston University. He has set up a satellite office in Boston and markets Grottos and Fins from a small dark room. He frequently dates super-models and is often seen in the company of the world famous author Tandalayah Goldfarb. Her most famous work, of course, is the semi autobiographical novel “Dradel This”. Recent attempts to contact Mr. Purcell have been fruitless although he weekly asks for and receives funds for “capital expenditures”. He is presently under indictment for money laundering and is being fitted for an orange jumpsuit.
Luca Brasi (nee Luca, Elbee, Mr. Brasi, Luke, Brasi Boy), VP Security The most interesting and, undoubtedly, shortest executive in the Grottos and Fins hierarchy is the hirsute Mr. Brasi, 49. He has yet to put together an intelligible sentence and looks remarkably like a dog. He is perhaps the only senior executive in the United States with an IQ less than the prime rate and is often seen staring at a blank wall. It is widely rumored that Mr. Brasi is dumber than a box of rocks. When Mr. Brasi is not working, he generally wanders the streets in the company of a small troll. |
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Grottos & Fins Madison, CT 06443 email: grottosandfins@aol.com www.grottosandfins.com 203-623-2529 |
